Usually we want to avoid “problems”.  We want life to be smooth and easy.  We want everything to go our way – all of the time. 

I don’t know about you, but that certainly isn’t the way my life works.  I am open for that to happen.  I vision it and I intend it and then, life just seems to do what life seems to do.  Eventually, if I hold my vision and intention long enough, and if it’s for my hightest good, I get some of what I want.  The problem is there always hidden, unexpected surprises, things we call “problems” that come with what I envisioned and intended. 

“Problems” seem to part of the human experience.  “Problems” are like gravity.  They are always present on some level or another.  So, let’s treat problems like gravity.  What do we do with gravity?  We play with it.  We have all kinds of games that require gravity’s participation.  How would we play baseball without gravity?

Gravity is fun.  It requires us to be inventive and creative.  “Problems” can be fun too.  “Problems” require us to get out of our comfort zone.  They require us to think outside the box.  They require us to be creative and to communicate with others.  “Problems” demand that we take another step.  If we chose not to take action, the “problem” gets bigger, and at some point in time the “ouch” will force us to do something different.  It forces us to step into an expansive place.  It forces us to be more of who we truly are – co-creators.

We are in a time when it looks like there are so many problems that people are going into overwhelm.  Let’s not go into overwhelm, let’s go into overdrive.  Let’s stand up and grow forth.  As strange as it may sound, this can be a fun and wondrous process.  We are at one of those times in history, that future generations will look back with awe.  Our children’s, children’s children will say, “I wish I could have been alive when all of that was going on!  Those folks back then really set the stage for us.  They really made a difference!”

“Your body goes where your eyes lead you. Look at what you want more of, and your body will follow.  We get what we focus on.”
 

If this is true, then what you have in your life right now is a result of what you have been focusing on.  If you like what you are experiencing, then you are right on track.  If you don’t like what you are experiencing then it’s time to focus on something else. 
 

This is counter to what we’ve have been trained to do.  We’ve have been trained to focus on those things that are not working.  If you are doing poorly on math, then you need to focus on those math problems that you keep getting wrong, or those spelling words you missed, or that tire on your car that is going bald, or that extra weight you want to get rid of, or the hurt you experience in your relationship, or the lack of money you have to pay your monthly bills.  Yes, you have been taught to focus on the things that don’t work, and to worry about those things you don’t have.  And, you get what you focus on.  Ugh!
 

So, how do you change this you ask?  The process is simply, but not necessarily easy.  The process is to be aware of what you are focusing on.  If it is negative, then you just refocus toward the positive.  That’s it.  It’s that simply.  Ah, but you are so well trained to do just the opposite.  Your care givers and teachers told you that if you don’t worry, then terrible things will happen.  And since you want to avoid terrible things and you’ve been a good student!  So you worry and fret, and worry and fret, and worry and fret. . .  What a wonderfully well greased pattern!  Ugh!
 

The fastest and easiest way I have found to change a habitual pattern is to follow the “5 steps to change” process.  For a detail explanation of the process, look on page 43 of The Keys to Joy-Filled Living.  Basically the process is:  (1) Be aware you are focusing on a negative outcome.  (2) Thank your self for being aware you are in a negative pattern.  (3) Forgive your self for any judgments you have toward your self or others.  (4) Come up with an alternative – create a positive outcome.  (5) Take an action step toward the outcome you desire.
 

 In time, when you look at your life, you’ll be living the positive, wondrous life you have been projecting.  The key here is to keep going.  Don’t stop the positive projections.  If you continuously, consciously, choose the life you want, you will get what you focus on.

“No one is in control.  Control does not exist.  It is an illusion.”
 

“This isn’t true!  I am in control of my life.  I do what I want to do.  No one tells me what to do.  I am my own boss.  I keep myself safe and secure by maintaining control. ” 
 

Boy, do I wish that were true.  Unfortunately, we can’t control anyone outside of ourselves.  We can’t control how they act, how they think or how they feel.  If you think you can, then good luck.  You might be able to get someone to do what you want temporarily by cajoling them, paying them or intimidating them, but total control, all of the time?  We can’t even control ourselves.  We think things, feel things and do things that we don’t want to do – things we say we’ll never do. And, we still do them.  We can’t even control our own breath. 
 

If all of this is true, then how can we be safe and secure?  What can we depend upon?  These two questions surface an interesting belief.  Most of us believe that if we control things or people, then we will be safe – then life will be consistent or dependable.  Check this out next time you want someone to do what you want.  Ask yourself:  “Why do I want them to do it my way?”  I am suggesting, if you track it back, that you want them to do it your way because then you will feel safe and secure. 
 

There are a few things we can feel secure about and depend on in this world.  One is that the sun will show up tomorrow morning, and two, gravity will keep us and things from floating away, and three, we will keep breathing until we stop.  We can depend on these things.  We can feel secure that these things will continue on through time.  We can’t control them, we can only accept them, play with them and enjoy them.  They are constants.  Isn’t that nice? 
 

Feeling Safe and secure comes from something other than control.  It comes from being connected to that which is breathing you.  Go inside and find it.  The journey is filled with joy.